earning you, losing you
by Have no color
Summary: love is painful, yet I love you. Why can't you love me twice, scarhead?. HPDM. ONESHOT flangst *?* maybe :p


I can't breathe any longer. Yes, I can't… I'm no longer able to pull my chest and force it to take the oxygen inside my body again, I wouldn't be able since I lose my other half since I lost the savior or my life, since I could no longer claim them as mine. It just like if I only had one lung not one pair of lungs._  
_

I've lost my sense of direction, I lose rights and lefts, and I lost the navigation of life. As I had nowhere to go, I am lost in this nightmare alone since I've lose you in my journey to the end.

My memories are killing me inside; these feelings are eating me alive. I can't stop myself to think about you and it just becomes worse and worse… I need a pill to kill you inside, to kill you from my being._  
_

But you're so calm because it has nothing to do with you, because everything was about me! You're the one who get engaged with someone else while I… can just wait and dream of you…_  
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Do you even want to keep the last bit of existence of me on you? My last bite on you… our last time meeting and doing something so intimate… did you still have the mark? _  
_

Sorry, I really am sorry, for not being the person you want_. _Even when I say that I hate you, even if I say that I love you. I am still as sorry as I can't think away to stop everythingat least not now… not now I suppose_… _Because it leaves me wound and leave you wound_  
_

As I don't want you to see me sad… and I don't want to let you go_. _As it makes me almost lose my sanity and makes my body shiver in the hot air.I shall stop dreaming that we had our fate… but I believe that there will be a way for us to be together somehow…or that you would not forget that I loved you eternally and without reason… no if or but… and I will not fall out of love from you, cause love is a feeling you felt once.Even if you don't really love me… I'll be okay, since you gave me the feeling I always wanted to feel._  
_

Harry James Potter, you are my only love and you know it. You know how much I love your smile… you know how much I hate your tears… you know how stupid love is to us… yet, it is a sacred and scary thing, one rarity that came to our life in such easy way… you shall stop threaten me in my dream… or else… I will never wake up from it. As I knew that you will never come again, never catch me again, never hold me against my fear, you will never protect me again, you will never love me again, never be mine again. Why can' you love me twice scarhead… why can't you?

Yes I tried so hard to believe that we are over…. But I can't believe that we are over… I can't believe that I lost my other brain, lung, heart, liver, everything, losing you meant losing me, losing myself mean dead, if nothing worse. _  
_

I keep smiling yet crying endlessly  
Love is really funny, really frightening  
Please, stop it now, if only I was able to wake up from my dream

Love is hurt as we know it. As I know that it could hurt me more than just this little scratch. Yet, love is a nightmare that we human could never fight. It is a very beautiful dream that we human had always cry for. Love scenery is a sinful view that we human always hungry for. Love really hurts… is a fact that all mankind have to face whether if they want or they don't want to. Nothing can change the truth; no one can throw the fact of Love.

I can no longer survive in this world with love. I can no longer loving you alone… I need your responds… I want your answer. Because I want to live my life without any regrets and guilt. Two things that I wasn't suppose to feel

The clock ticking faster than I wish, as I waiting for you on this bench, in a park where we call our first truce. This is the time to end all of my pain and my misery, time to hear your answer as you already have it.

"You came…" in a very beautiful formal-robe that makes me blind you came.

I went closer to you, trying to tell myself that I can't do this anymore but I need to… I need to hold your arms… I need to feel you once more time, "Harry…"

Harry only smiled that little smile that lit the whole room, those green eyes showing obvious love that tore my heart apart, shred it to pieces… burn it to nothing. "Draco… Malfoy…" he breathed my name softly, walking quietly over me and pressed his lips to mine before I was able to say something. "Today is valentine day right?" I nodded dumbly, "Lets run away…" he said all of the sudden before bending on one knee and hold a velvet box that contain two platinum band. "And marry me…"

Love really hurts… it so hurt until you can just run away to somewhere far and leave the entire precious thing behind. It too hurt until you run away from the life you own and start a new one, without anyone knowing and no one helps. Love really hurts… its too hurting until you lose words to express it.

For the entire lover in the world… you must remember… love really hurts…

"Yes Harry! YES!" I screamed happily, pounced him down to the hard concrete and kissing him soundly. "Happy valentine… love."


End file.
